Thursday, February 2, 2017


The Ring two is directed by Hideo Nakata and stars Naomi Watts, Simon Baker, David Dorfman, and Sissy Spacek. The plot of the movie is six months after the incidents involving the lethal videotape, new clues prove that there is a new evil lurking in the darkness. Just like my review of The Ring this review will have spoilers so watch the film first. The Ring was a pretty successful film and it practically ignited the remake of the Japanese horror crazy, but with success there comes pressure for a sequel even when it's not necessary. They did try to make the sequel a success even getting the director of the original Japanese film. So why is this film so disappointing let's find out.    The film opens with a teenage boy and girl alone in the guys' house and he's noticeably anxious over the time for some reason. He tells her that he has something to show her an incredibly scary movie. You can see where this is going and it's not to set a romantic mood. He's pretty damn insisted that she watch it. He leaves her with the tape kissing her to persuade her further. While in the kitchen he's desperately pacing watching the clock. He shouts for her to play it and that's when he hears the tape playing. He gets a phone call from someone congratulating him on surviving and managing to get someone to watch his tape. He sees water coming from under the door and knows there's something wrong. When he goes to investigate it's revealed that the girl played the tape, but covered her eyes so she didn't actually watch it so now the guys gonna die. As the guy approaches the TV he gets drawn in as Samara climbs out of the well and kills him. That death scene pales in comparison to the death scenes in the first film.  Why the hell was the image of the well different to the image in the first film that's just a bizarre and pointless change that didn't need to happen just reuse the footage. The deaths in the first film were shocking because we didn't know what to expect and we actually cared about the people dying. Who cares about this guy when all we've seen him do is manipulate and lie to save his own skin. so all in all a terrible opening.    The film picks back up after that nonsense with the main plot which will get just as nonsensical. Rachel and Aidan have moved out of the city into a small town to get away from everything to do with the tape. They sit down to dinner with Rachel looking at Aiden's photographs because he's taken up photography like his father. Rachel complains that he's always calling her by her name and not something like mom which will be an impotent and very stupid plot point later.    Later Rachel's at her new newspaper job speaking with her boss. He's complaining that she changed his lead article and she changed it because it was wrong. So he's an idiot basically. Just before she leaves the office she hears the news of the kid at the start who died. Rachel recognizes elements of the story like the kid's distorted face and being found in front of the TV.    She goes to investigate finding the place tapped off by police. That obviously doesn't stop her and she gets into the ambulance to inspect the body. Upon opening the body bag she does indeed find the kid was another victim of the tape. As she tries to close the body bag Samara pops up and grabs her saying that she's found her. I assume that Samara can manifest herself so easily now because Rachel let her out of the well, however, the main problem with that is that The Ring sequel isn't like The Ring at all and a perfect example of that is that the tape never gets played again.    Rachel goes back to the house when it's quiet to search for the tape. Once she finds the tape she drives to the middle of nowhere to burn it and for some reason when she burns the tape the tape screams. So there goes the cursed tape from a ring movie in a completely uninteresting way. Back with Aidan in bed, a sound wakes him up and he goes to see what it was going to the TV. The TV is on static and he tries to turn it off but nothing happens. As he gets closer the TV turns to the crappy well and water starts flooding the room with Samara approaching the screen and when she gets to it she grabs him and tries to pull him in, but it turns out that was all a nightmare. The first movie did something similar and I didn't have a problem with it because it was well done here it's just cheap and the first of many reasons why this film is more of a generic ghost story movie rather than The Ring.    Later that day Rachel and Aidan go to a local fare Rachel looks around while Aidan takes photographs and it's all very dull because nothing happens this is not atmosphere building it's just filler. Rachel finds a lot of videotapes looking weary at an unmarked case and then her boss shows up to do some flirting and snooping on Rachel asking why she's moved to the town. She loses sight of Aidan as he goes into the public bathroom with the toilets backing up. Aidan tries washing his hands, but the faucet doesn't work and then a fly comes out. Eventually, Aidan sees in the mirror that Samara has appeared behind him as she floats towards him. OK first that's not the original Samara and it's really noticeable, but also the floating across the floor thing looked really silly what happened to the way she moved before that was far more creepy and unnatural to me. Rachel finds Aidan in the bathroom constantly taking pictures and he's also freezing cold. She really doesn't think much of it although she should. As they drive back home Rachel asks about his nightmare and if Samara was there his silence pretty much says it all. Rachel is forced to slam on the brakes as a deer walks into the road all the while Aidan is shouting not to stop the car. The horribly CGI deer attacks the car smashing the windows. It's a clear attempt to one-up the horse going crazy thing in the first movie that doesn't really work because the horse was real. Rachel manages to drive off, but not before another deer runs into the front of the car. She stops again as load more CGI crap surround the car.    When they get home Rachel calls a doctor while Aidan sleeps, but as he does the lights in his room start going crazy. This is poltergeist nonsense that feels nothing like the psychological horror of The Ring anymore especially when all the appliances in the kitchen start going crazy too. Rachel runs upstairs to Aidan finding the window open but also finding Samara scratching at the wall which is quite a creepy visual. When Rachel tries to get Aidan out of bed he's actually standing in Samara's place. As he turns around the wall starts to burn forming the image of the tree from the first movie with Aidan saying that he made it because he saw the image in his mind.    So now Rachel decides to take her son to work I guess it takes your sick and haunted child to work day. I really don't understand why that was her first choice. Aiden tells Rachel that Samara can't hear people when they sleep which will be another plot point later. Rachel's boss comes in than he takes her and Aidan to his place.    They run a bath for Aidan, but he's afraid to get into the water and that's because Samara is afraid of water. That's news to me because she sure as hell enjoys using water a lot. She doesn't seem like a person afraid of the stuff. It's almost like they made that up for this stupid movie or something. Rachel goes back home to get some things and she finds Aidan's camera and looking through the photos she finds the ones discovering Samara is in them. Which finally cements the idea in Rachel's head that what's going on is her doing.    Back with Aidan Rachel's boss is looking after him and doing what he does best snooping on the phone with the police about Rachel. His conversation is cut short when the bathroom door closes and is locked with Aidan inside and water starts running from under the door. Rachel returns asking Aiden to open the door with it starting to leak water. As the door opens Rachel sees all the water in the tub is flying out and she can see that Samara is holding Aiden. When Rachel tries to talk to him all the waterfalls drenching the place. Rachel tries to get Aidan out of the tub, but Samara pops up instead in exactly same way someone who's afraid of water wouldn't. Rachel starts drowning Samara, but her boss comes in to get the wrong idea as he sees Rachel drowning Aiden and suspects child abuse because Aidan keeps asking why she's doing this to him with the guy thinking he's talking about Rachel.    We then move to a hospital where Aiden's been taken. Rachel gets told about Aidan's condition they think Rachel's hurt him on purpose. While getting coffee Rachel's boss continues his line of questioning asking her what the whole story is. This movie is turning into a daytime soap I guess I should be glad for all the poltergeist shit it breaks up the monotony of this crap.  Rachel tries showing the guy the pictures Aidan took of Samara and she tells him her whole story. He obviously doesn't believe it. Rachel says Samara wants to be Aiden and she tells him to take his picture again for proof. Which I'm sure won't sound like crazy talk at all. Rachel's with Aidan talking to him as he grabs her arm and she gets a vision After the vision a woman from social services appears to ask some questions of Rachel. She's there to see if what's happening is indeed child abuse and when Rachel doesn't cooperate the woman tells her she's not to be alone with him. Rachel tells Samara that she won't be staying before leaving the room. The stuff with the Social Services although makes sense in the context of what's happening to Aidan in the whole scheme of things and the plot of the film it doesn't have that much of an impact though. It just happens in the middle of the movie and then the film moves on. It's becoming painfully obvious that the filmmakers had a simple plot outline that they had no idea how to extend into a cohesive narrative.    So continuing with this disjointed mess Rachel has decided to look further into Samara's history going to the adoption office to see if they can tell her anything, but they won't give her any information. Rachel goes all the way back to Moscow Island and to the Morgan ranch to investigate. This is just retracing the steps the last film took with little reason. The house is being sold and it's open to the public as she's greeted by the realtor. The house is empty now and Rachel asks about furniture which the guy tells her is in the basement. Rachel goes into the basement looking for some kind of clue. She finds an old suitcase that has Samara's stuff from the orphanage and also a book that has for Samara written on it. Which would make me think that it's a book of photos or something nice for a child to read, but it contains news clippings of how her mother tried to drown her and strange images of suicide and anatomy.     Back at the hospital, the Social Services doctor comes in to talk to Aidan. Aidan asks for his mommy indicating he's now fully possessed by Samara. I told you it was a stupid plot point. Aidan or Samara keeps asking to go home. Saying that Rachel loves him/her because she found her in the well. When Aiden asks again to go home Samara gets all evil bitch kill crazy again. The doctor says no and then the movie becomes the Omen with Aidan controlling the doctor"s actions and making her inject a syringe full of air into herself. Then he/she walks out of the hospital unquestioned because that's what would happen naturally.    Rachel has gone to the orphanage Samara was at asking to speak to someone who would have worked there at the time. She sees the Mother Superior and after seeing the book she remembers the entire indecent with crystal clarity. At least we assume so she could be making the whole entire story up for all we know especially when she says that Samara's mother told her the Samara was immaculately conceived by Cthulhu. That's not a joke by the way Samara's backstory is that her father was a demon of the ocean. Rachel finds out where she needs to go to speak to Samara's mother. Rachel talks to Samara's mother and she's pretty much cuckoo for cocoa puffs at this point babbling and not being very helpful. The only thing she says to Rachel that will be helpful is to listen to her son and do what he says.    Aidan has made it home and Rachel's boss because like I told you can't keep his nose out lets himself in. He's still asking Aidan about the supposed abuse from Rachel. Then he tries to take Aidan's picture which he's very much against because that would show Samara. He promises not to take his picture but sets up the camera to take a picture remotely. That's it for him he's dead and anything that he was involved in with the plot never gets resolved. Rachel comes home with Aidan greeting her happily. When Aidan calls her mommy she knows it's Samara. Aidan tells Rachel that her boss went away, but he's actually still in his car and Rachel opens the door to find him dead. Rachel goes back inside distressed as she hides in her bedroom. Rachel ends up falling asleep which is when the real Aidan talks to her and like Evelyn said Aiden tells Rachel what to do drown him and Samara will leave. Rachel joins Aiden watching TV and because Samara never sleeps neither does he. Rachel is forced to drug him with sleeping pills. Once he's unconscious she runs a bath a puts Aidan in. Samara tries to fake it making it seem like Aidan is back to normal, but she dumps him in any way. The whole scene is pretty creepy because we don't know if this will work and Samara is known to create hallucinations so it could all be a trick. No, the film is not that clever as it works with an awful CGI Samara disappearing. Samara's not finished yet as the TV turns on with the well on screen. Samara starts walking to the screen and Rachel approaches her seemingly knowing what the hell to do as she lets herself get grabbed and dragged into Samara's world. Rachel lands in the well and starts to climb out and then Samara starts crawling after her. Rachel dislodges some stones making water pour out casing Samara to fall and getting out Rachel closes the well. Now to get out of Samara's world Rachel needs to jump from the cliff the way Anna Morgan did, She jumps and appears back home with Aidan and with that this nonsense is finally over.    The Ring two was very disappointing and I'm going to give it 2 out of 5 stars.

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